Well I’m not very insightful this week. I was however experiencing another first by watching the Democratic National Convention. What about you? Have you ever watched a political convention? It brought to mind all of the issues currently facing Americans. Politicos like to phrase it as “waging a war against ______” (you fill in the blank.) We have so many to choose from now. We have the war on terror, the war on drugs, and the latest greatest, the war on obesity. Are we winning any of these wars yet? Let’s face it, do we even care about the war on drugs? It’s a plant, get over it. What about obesity? I have that solution, get off your ass.
Which finally brings me to a point. (Like I said, I am not very insightful this week). I am waging my own personal war and it’s on poison ivy! As some of you know, I am apparently very allergic to poison ivy, and have been battling a horrible reaction to it for 6 weeks!! This has included steroids, acupuncture, herbal concoctions, gels, pastes, more steroids, more acupuncture, gels and paste, and finally a lot of complaining.
And apparently, I am not alone. Just today there was a story in the Dallas Morning News regarding the war on poison ivy. And, always newsworthy is my brother’s opinion, a horticulturist, that poison ivy has become bigger, badder and more pervasive then ever. Because of the risk of someone having a severe allergic reaction not only on the outside but also the inside, it cannot be burned at random. It’s also a weed, but one that has staying power, so spraying it is a short-term solution while putting unknown additives in our drinking water. And let’s not forget the potential cost to eradicate poison ivy. Surely there are more pressing issues, like schools offering tofu instead of refried beans to our overweight students.
So until a solid plan is formulated to win the war on poison ivy is invented, I have two ways to avoid it.
Never drink in an open public park with all of your friends where weeds are not well maintained.
Never, ever let your friends persuade you to urinate in the un-maintained weeds in an open public park when drunk, especially if you are a girl!