Monthly Archives: November 2008

It’s a Time to Give and A Time to Give Back


I’m not talking about Christmas gifts although, ‘tis the season to give.  So for all of my  friends out there who plan on giving and receiving generously this year, I want to pass on some etiquette rules.   Let me first lay out some definitions.  A “gift” is the act of giving no matter what the item.  You are “giving” something, a gift of money to a charity or a toy to a child, with no expectation of return.  This is opposed to a marriage proposal.  A marriage proposal usually comes with an engagement ring, it is a “proposal” centered on conditions being fulfilled.  The first is permanent, the second is conditional. 

If you are considering a luxury item as a gift to your special partner (wife, girlfriend, boyfriend, dog . . .), like jewelry, a car, a new dog house, then this is permanent.  It is a gift, and if you break up or the dog runs away, don’t expect the gift to be returned.  
If you intend to ask that special one to marry you, you might consider separating this from any gifts.  (I do hope the dog is not included on this one).   An engagement ring is not permanent.  It is a conditional gift.  That is, it is conditioned upon acceptance, and ultimate marriage.  If, for some strange reason, the conditions to the engagement are not met, i.e. no marriage takes place and you both break up, then the engagement ring should be returned.  (Ladies, did you hear that??)
A recent story in the news over this exact issue caught my attention.  Apparently there is a couple (or used to be a couple) in Connecticut who were engaged to each other.   The man provided a $25,000 engagement ring to the woman.  She accepted.  Something went amiss and they broke up.  Now, he is asking for his ring back and she is refusing to return it claiming it was a “gift.”  Legal analysts claimed that he can now fight in court for the ring back.  Unless he has done something hanious to cause the break up, (and the fact that they do not reside in Montana or Kansas), he should have no problem having a judge order that the ring be returned. 
I’m sure at this very point in the article you are saying “that poor sap was taken by another greedy woman.”  And, on many levels I would agree.  I have seen it too many times.   Why didn’t I follow this path?  I could have, but call me stupid, I decided I didn’t want to make any exceptions in my life so I could wear a $25,000 diamond ring.  And my dad showed up for my dance recitals.
Any way, the message here should be clear.  Three things need to be considered during this holiday season.
1.  A gift is a gift is a gift.  It is permanent.
2.  An engagement ring is part of a proposal set on conditions to be met.
3.  Think long term not fantasy.  
More silly Christmas ideas to come!

Pam, Brad and Obama??


What does Pamela Anderson, Brangelina and the Obama family have in common? Other than the horrors of living under the watchful eye of media so that everyday people can get a shameful taste of some fame, they have absolutely nothing in common.

Why did I pick these three? Instead of spending a quiet weekend meditating, I made the mistake of watching television. This is what I learned:

1. Pamela Anderson recently announced that she “quits!” As announced on some entertainment show that I was unfortunately watching by accident, Pam Anderson has declared that she is done acting. Thank God. I feel so much better now.

2. Brangelina are so highly photographed and pursued by the media that who doesn’t know them or every little detail about their lives? Haven’t you all had enough? I’m hoping that they too will announce that they are quiting as well. Their acting is not exactly what I would consider award winning. (One caveat is “Girl Interrupted”, I do really like that movie).

3. Last, the Obama family is being forced to choose a puppy for the Whitehouse. Apparently Barak mentioned they may get a puppy, but maybe they changed their mind? Why will the media not drop it? The media has now created “The Obama Puppy Watch!”

I know if you reading this blog, you either 1) find this somewhat entertaining; or 2) have entertained yourself to a point that there is nothing else but my blog. Well, I have some new great entertainment for you that does not require reading cheesy tabloid magazines or television media.

Forget Pam Anderson, Brangelina and the Obama Family puppy. Now you can watch one of the number one streaming videos at It is a streaming video of 6 Shiba Inu puppies, and at any one time there is about 10,000 people watching. It’s actually mesmorizing and soothing in some wierd way. It might even prove to lower your blood pressure!

Have a happy week and a wonderful Thanksgiving!