Uncategorized | Cynthetics

Picture lots of beautiful women; some in slinky dresses and high heels, others covered in mud; all dawning large gaudy hats of every color, make and model. No, it’s not a high-tone mud-wrestling match, it is of course, the Kentucky Derby’s “Run for the Roses.” Everything is there from the Millionaire’s circle where the highly dressed women are draped in jewels and the mud covered women are having a blast sucking down Kentucky Whiskey in the infield.
After several mint juleps, placing your wagers based on colors of silks, and a good mud slinging competition, participants will watch the most exciting 2 minutes in sports history.

For those of us who do not own a purple silk tie, spats or a baby blue 18″ brimmed hat with netting, we can still join in on the fun and place our bets. Yup, here’s how and why.
1. Obtain a large HD plasma or LCD television
2. Make sure you have cable or dish
3. Log onto the Kentucky Derby website and place your bet!
http://www.kentuckyderby.com/2009/

According to the United States Code and the FBI’s Website, betting online is illegal, UNLESS, and even though your state may not allow gambling, there is a carved out exception. For example, in Texas, gambling is illegal. In the United States, Internet gambling is illegal, highly illegal. BUT, Texas has an exception carved out specifically for horse racing. So does the United States.

Title 15, Chapter 57-Interstate Horseracing, Section 3001 et. seq. of the United States Code, allows wagering on horse racing in person or electronically. However, make sure your State allows pari mutuel wagers on horse racing as well. Both states, where the bet is placed and where the horse race is held, must allow wagering on horse racing.

So what if you are a fantasy league player??? In the words of Ryan Sechrest on American Idol . . . . YOU’RE SAFE! Or are you? According to the FBI’s website on Internet Crimes, fantasy sports teams are legal, but I would defer to state law before you sign up for that fantasy league! Even better, check with your friendly neighborhood criminal defense lawyer before placing any wagers online!

Next week I’ll give you my pick for the Derby win, the beginning of the triple crown; and an update of what the Supremes are up to in the form of a horse race! (I’m not talking about the singing group either).

Carpe Diem!

First, I want to announce that I now have an official follower on my blog! As Bon Scott of AC/DC once said, “Thank you, thank you, thank you.” (Say it in a drunken Australian accent.)

Next, I wanted to address my sports picks from my previous blog. Let’s just say that I was smart not to bet real money.

1. Duke is out of the final four. Oh well, I only picked them because “Duke” is a cool name.

2. My tennis team, “The Gall” couldn’t even beat a team from a home owner’s association, oh wait, that was the only team we beat. But my partner and I created quite a stir on the court. (My “doubles” partner. Get your mind out of the gutter.) With gale force winds and temperatures below freezing, we took our final set to a tie break. Everyone was at the fence watching. It was a nail biter with lots of screeching and hollering. But we ultimately succumbed to defeat. (Bad team photo on my Facebook page.)

3. After NASCAR, I think I will stick to something I know, horse racing. The Kentucky Derby!

4. Sorry golf fans, I just can’t hang.

And now for something completely different:

If that saying rings a bell and you are a Monty Python fan to the nth degree, check out http://pythonline.com. It’s great. They even have a link to the Ministry of Silly Walks!

For More Interesting Random Stuff:

I have now become a campaign manager for someone running for city council of a small town. Fortunately, she has no opponent. Sheeeewwwww.

More interesting, Everett Newton, the Rock and Roll Attorney, and his band, Little Morphine Annie have now been selected to provide sound track music for a horror film. There will be a screening with the band to play a 20 minute set at the Studio Movie Grill in Addison, TX on June 18th at 7:00 pm. It will be horrific!!!!

Last, if you are looking for some trigger words for 2009, here you go:

Transparency (who are you kidding??)

Anti-Terror (uhhh? Couldn’t we just use the word “nice?”)

Conficker (If you know what this means, that may not be good)

Carpe Diem!