I hope The Knife Show has inspired you to succeed in every way this new year of 2010.  It did me, with the exception of my actual blog about the knife show.  My last blog stunk so much, I thought I would try and make up for it by writing an exciting new entry that was sure to entertain and please.  Let me start by apologizing now. 

See, it all starts while I am doing something really important, like washing the gray right out of my hair or polishing my nails.  It’s usually some mandatory task that is designed to make manufacturers of beauty products rich and me temporarily satisfied with my appearance.  There is always a requirement as well that both hands be put to full use, thus leaving me unable to jot down and shre those great ideas that pop into my head.  For example, while taking a shower you remember something important, and as you step out, it’s lost in space forever, only to appear again in your subconscious dream of you on a motor cycle riding across the country, rich and free.  Except when you wake up, the great idea, like the winning lottery numbers, escapes once again into thin air along with the motorcycle, never to be retrieved.

Which brings me to this rambling piece of blog, and back to an idea I have injected many times . . . that of a device to be implanted in our heads for moments such as these.  Just think, while you are dying that beard, you might have an epiphany, and alas, you don’t need to reach for a pen and paper, or even leave the confines of your bathroom, simply start recording.  You can continue applying your ebony gue with a miniature comb to your facial hair and record away.  So instead of worrying about the limited built in RAM currently provided in our cabazas (that is Spanish for “heads”), we can store as much as we want in words and images (up to a certain amount of megabytes of course.)  My RAM is so limited that even if I was able to hold onto a moment of brilliance from the shower to a notepad, I would surely dump some other important file on the way, like the one containing my name.

I can see it now, Apple will surely be the first to develop it, and it will be called the “I-Brain!”  It will come with proprietary software, contain 100 terabyte of storage, sized smaller than a dime, and be outrageously expensive.  I can’t wait.

In the meantime, here are some websites to keep your brain busy, or at least to entertain yourself:  Maybe something will catch your eye.

For People who want to Shut off the Brain: 
1. Chill out by listening to XM Chill on your satellite. Don’t have it satellite? See number 3.

2.  Move your neighbor’s satellite in the middle of the night.  hee hee, just kidding.

3. Pull up your iTunes on your computer and click on the radio icon on the left. iTunes software is free at http://www.itunes.com/, and so are the radio stations on iTunes.) Pick a genre of music you like. For example, “ambient”. Pick a radio station, for example, “Chill”. Sit on your couch and close your eyes. Don’t turn on the TV, just sit and see how long you can shut your brain off. For those of you who cannot “shut it off” iTunes also has talk radio – for free!

4. Watch a movie on Joost, http://www.joost.com/. It’s free! Yes, there are a few commercials, but the movie is uncut and the commercials are minimal (and the same volume).

5. Put up lights in your back yard, not just for 90 days, but permanently brighten it up. Who cares what the neighbors think, or what the UL recommends on Christmas lights.

Can’t Shut it off?:
6. Use “the Google” to search yourself on the Internet. It’s amazing what you will find.
7. Take free Spanish lessons on the Internet, http://www.123teachme.com/learn_spanish/beginner/

8.  Do a crossword puzzle that is interactive, http://www.usatoday.com/ (go to games).

Ode to the brain power and have a great week!

C

The chaos of the season is over, and everyone can truly relax and slow down the production of cortisol. No more shopping, wrapping, fretting, blowing budgets, eating (sorry), and assembling. Now ‘tis the season to relax and reflect, at least for those mere few days between the cleanup of destroyed wrapping paper and the last shot you take on New Year’s Eve.

One of the things i like to do in this snippet of mandatory vacation from my employer is to observe, reflect and record. Since I have yet to develop a gadget to be implanted in my head that will record and regurgitate on command, I shall blog. Upon reflection, I often end up with a long list of things about myself that should, must or really really need to be improved.

Incredibly, the knife show had an allure similar to zen teachings that I believe will help me improve in 2010. Things I learned from the knife show:

1. If Tom O’Dell can sell knives, you can do anything!
2. Follow the Zen teaching of no resistance. Just go with the flow and practice acceptance, especially when there is nothing else on television but the knife show.
3. Some knives just do not want to be opened. Like uncooperative people, children or pets . . . just leave them alone.
4. Don’t drink and play with knives, they are sharp and you will hurt yourself or others.
5. Last, have fun no matter what you are doing, even while watching the knife show.

Well, I can feel the improvement beginning already. If only I can get past something I saw while Christmas shopping. I came across a couple of books that shocked me. Offending me is not easy, but what I found really got to me. The reason, because what I saw pointed out everything I am not . . . the perfect girl.

What I found sitting on a shelf in a store were two books, side by side, just like a man and woman would walk through life. One was blue and one was pink. The blue book was entitled The Boys’ Book of Greatness, Even More Ways to be the Best at Everything. The pink book was entitled The Girls’ Book of Glamour, A Guide to Being a Goddess.

There is clearly something wrong with this picture. Why can’t girls be great? Why do boys have to be the “best” at everything? Are they also the best at decorating, cooking, being pretty? Probably, since men design clothing, makeup and have crazy cooking shows.

What are we teaching girls? Have the sisters of the bra-burning days taught us nothing? Are we all supposed to be dumb airheads only to be seen by boys as objects? What about the boys that want to actually engage in an intellectual conversation with girls and all of a sudden we have nothing to add?

I’m no Goddess, and never will be, but I feel better now that I have reflected. Of course, my list of improvements just expanded and I don’t think the knife show is going to help me.

I do hope everyone has a wonderful new year with much success and happiness.

Carpe Diem!