Monthly Archives: August 2008

Update on the Election


Several people have asked my opinion on the current election. But before I can go there, I must vent about our electoral system (invented by dudes wearing wigs by the way). I would wager that there are a lot of high school students whom, like many of their parents, do not understand the U.S. electoral system. I know I don’t. But most high school students of voting age, and more importantly, their parents, understand the voting system on American Idol.

I fit in the category of professionals with no children who one night turned on the television for mindless entertainment to forget about our responsibilities and got sucked into a show called American Idol like it was the Poltergeist. There was no shortage of crazy outfits and slurred speech from Paula; idiocy and fence sitting from Randy; and fantasy causing accented-filled insults from Simon. Connect the dots people – American Idol has reported 60 million viewers on a single episode. Not necessarily all of voting age, but someone had to pay for the television and the cable?

Despise AI? How about Hollywood? I do. News flash – On Aug. 10th at 1:30 am, Barack Obama ran a 30-minute infomercial on Ion Television. This is the first for a Presidential candidate. McCain’s campaign placed Barack Obama in equal celebrity status to Paris Hilton and Brittany Spears by using their images in an ad. Barack looks pretty good on film. Lastly, Hollywood is about to turn our Secretary of State, Condoleezza Rice into a movie star babe. The trend is definitely to reach out to the younger crowd. Why not, old people shouldn’t be driving to the polls any way!

Here’s how the election would work. Debates would be scheduled for several weeks. Certain days will be designated for certain issues. For example, Monday-Taxes; Tuesday-war and foreign affairs; Wednesday-Abortion; Thursday-more taxes; and Friday-more war issues. (Forget social security, it will not be around much longer any way). Each candidate will have a call in number, 1-800-Not-sure or 1-800-4-Whitey. At the end of each week, there will be an elimination show with a lot of knuckle bumping and berating. It will be grand!

In all seriousness though, there will be no uncertainty as to who will win the election. There will be no elected officials making the ultimate decision for all of the population on who actually wins despite the popular vote.

Summer Olympics ONLY day 2!


I digress from my political silliness to comment on the 2008 Summer Olympic games like only I can and because I can. First, before I get into my crazy comments about the Olympics, I should advise that I have been to Europe only once, and it was to Italy. While in Italy, I noticed a lot of shoes that were shiny silver. Not women’s shoes, but all shoes, especially high top tennis shoes for men. I’m talking about shiny silver high top tennis shoes in glass display cases all over Italy like they were pieces of a the Coliseum in Rome. I just walked around wondering who the hell would actually wear these shoes!! Well, after seeing the opening of the Olympics, I figured it out.

My top five observations of the 2008 Olympic Games on Day 2:

1. The Italian athletes all wear shiny silver tennis shoes. I knew someone had to buy those shoes!??

2. The American athletes all looked like Ralph Lauren robot clones. I had to bet my boyfriend that they were really the Americans.

3. Swimmers should not leave their goggles on their foreheads before starting a race. When they move their goggles from their forehead to their eyes, the goggles leave red circles above their eyebrows. Makes me want to take a Sharpie and color in some pupils and eyelashes so they have eyes above their eyes. This would really make people watch the swimming!

4. During the rowing, there is a group of cyclists that ride along the bank watching the rowing. I can’t wait for the cyclists to run into each other and wreck out during a rowing competition. That would really make the rowing more exiting!

5. Last, but not least, the Italians would have done great in the men’s quadruple rowing had it not been for all the gold jewelry weighing them down!

More to come. Hope you are enjoying the Olympics.